My Ending
by Orokid
Summary: Twilight Of The Spirits fanfic Paulette thinks about the end of the war, finding that she wants a DIFFERENT ending for herself and another...


_orokid: I just finished the game, so I wanted to write at least one fanfics about this. I was soooo mad at the ending! Paulette's feelings for Kharg just… stopped… after her came back, so the humor was gone, to tell the truth. This isn't funny though (cause I can't write funny) so don't expect it just cause I'm complaining about the lack of humor at the end. ANYWAY! Onto the disclaimer…_

_Disclaimer: I do not own Arc the Lad: Twilight of the Spirits. I think it's an awesome game (despite the things that irk me) and it would be cool if I did. But I don't. End of story._

_**My Ending**_

It's finally over, although I can't admit that I'm completely happy about the outcome of it all. Sure, the Divine Ruler had been beaten and destroyed, all thanks to the Sprits who had chosen to leave this world for the next, and the Humans and Deimos have a temporary pact not to go after one another. To tell the truth, all of this came as what was expected of it, and it was a sort of happy ending that we could live with.

But. it wasn't an ending that _I_ liked. I'm not in the arms I want to be, but alone on a beach, without anyone to watch me.

I had been left alone in this world, my father a victim of the talking demons and my mother already gone. For a long time, I had wanted to take revenge upon the Deimos, but I couldn't at the end, when it came down to it. Even after they had taken their defeat atop the tower near where the flying fortress had been buried long ago, when Volk was begging me to take his life like my father had his son and wife. I just. couldn't do it. It reminded me too much of something- of someone.

Of Kharg.

My mind is haunted still with the memory of how he had looked at me when I, of all people, had pushed him away during the worst moment of his life. There had been astonishment, fear that he'd be alone from here on out, and a depression that I couldn't quite name with a source. I had betrayed him, and I had also done my best- no matter how many welts those rocks gave me or names I had been called- to make it up to him. It had taken days to convince them that, with his demon blood or not, he was still the same young man they had gotten to know, that they had watched grow from boy to his present state.

I don't know if he's forgiven me yet, though, and I wouldn't blame him if he didn't ever. I had committed the unspeakable crime of not being there for him when he needed me the most, so I'd understand if he's taken to secretly hating me.

Although. I _am_ forgetting hat the man I'm even talking about has the biggest heart I've ever known.

"Paulette!" His voice catches me by surprise, and I can feel the resentment towards Lilia grow in the pit of my stomach, within my heart. True, it wasn't _her _fault that I'm jealous, but I can't help how I feel.

As much as I don't want to admit it, the part Deimos man who I had grown up with, played with as a young girl, trained with when we were older. had received a piece of my heart that no one could ever take. He had been there when my father had been murdered, been there when my mother had left the world before that, and I suppose that was why I had felt so horrible when I had disregarded him completely.

But I still find that I'm in love with him, despite all of the things that I've done to him, and as much as I want to stop.

Finally, I allow a smile to grace my lips, looking over my shoulder to look at the one I've tried hard to stop loving. My heart only leapt for joy at the sight I had been granted with, and I could only feel my grin widen all the more. Kharg had shown up alone, without the company of any one, although I shouldn't be surprised at all. The moon was high in the air, placing a gentle glow on the beach I sat on, and the world seemed asleep at the mere feeling of this serene night.

"It's late, Paulette", he told me with a smile, knowing that he's just said the most obvious thing in the world. His smile teases me now, and I seemed to have lost my free will from that look alone. I was melting from that grin, and I could feel as if I were dying and flying into heaven.

Then again, we used to do this back home in the Castle Ruins. I'd sneak out of my room in the middle of the night and walk into the ruins, only to sit upon the very top step near the fallen column, and I'd watch the moon past the firelight. He'd. sense me or something. and walk out to join me ten minutes later, telling me that it's late and that my father would worry if he caught me out there.

I can feel myself curl into an upright ball, placing my chin on my knees as I hold my legs to me. The memory of my father reprimanding me those nights when he had found me only made my eyes prickle with tears, as well as make a bittersweet smile come onto my lips. "I can't get in trouble with my father anymore, Kharg. Its not like he can worry, considering that he's." My voice trails off and I can't seem to find my voice so to finish that statement. I'm such a weak little girl now, even after we've defeated the world's most powerful force.

He sits down beside me and I can feel his arm move over my shoulders, pulling me in closer to him. I can smell that sweet yet spicy scent that only he carries as I lean over to him, my head resting upon his strong shoulder. The last time I could remember him doing this was when my mother had died, although it's not like I'm complaining right now. I'm glad to have been pulled into this embrace again.

"I worry." he whispers softly into my ear, and I could feel my face heat up somewhat at the feel of his breath upon my skin. "Don't I matter?"

Right now, I am trying not to blush as much as I know I can, but I don't push him away- even when my mind is screaming at me to be playful, to be the boyish woman I had grown to be. "You matter." I tell him softly back, snuggling into his embrace (unconsciously, of course), immediately finding that familiar comfort one feels in the arms of the one they belong to. "You'll always matter."

"Then I'll always worry", he counters, laughing, and I find myself pushing back all of my feelings to kiss him like I've wanted to for all these years.

His chin sets itself upon the very top of my head, and I look back up to the moon. I really don't want this moment to end, I end up pleading silently to myself, to the moon. Don't make him stop holding me like he is now, like he loves me too. I don't want to wake up if this is a dream, as well.

My body unwinds, and I find the comfort pulling me in, towards the dreams that will take me from this moment, and I find myself fighting desperately not to allow myself the luxury of sleep. Why should I when the love of my life is holding me like this (although he's probably hoping that I'll find my peace in dreamland)? Why should I if this is where I find my peace? I don't want to go back into my fairytale-like illusions when this moment will only become a figment of my imagination in the morning.

Still, despite my hopes for staying awake in the midst of being in his embrace, my eyes droop until they are closed. A small stream of consciousness keeps me to this plane of existence, and I'm glad for that much.

"Paulette?" My body stirs slight at the sound of my name, and I try to keep my hold upon this moment in time, where my ending is real. This is what I want my ending to be, where I'm in the arms of my handsome prince, the man I care for the most. "I suppose you're asleep then…" he says, although I'm not sure if he's talking to me or himself right then. To tell the truth, I wouldn't care if he was conversing with himself out in the open. "Paulette, I…" He seems hesitant, and my ears ache to listen to the things that he's trying to say. "I know this is cowardly now, after all that we've been through, but…" I can feel his tension rising, his muscles tensing ever so slightly, and I know that this only happens when he's nervous to speak about something or another. I also know that, if I were not laying upon it, he'd he touching his birthmark. "I… I lo-"

And, in that instance, peaceful (yet irritating) dreams came upon my form, my ears no longer on this plane, but with my mind somewhere else.

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_orokid: hehehe… yeah… it sucks… it was a quick write in a class that I did because I had time. Will you please review? I don't care if you say "OMG! You suck!" But… please. ((Makes a pitiful looking face, tears falling down my cheeks.)) PLEASE?_


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